Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
