Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize