At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
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