so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
