she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
