i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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