...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
