OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
