Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize