2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize