Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize