I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize