Where is the hickey?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize