Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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