i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize