You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
