Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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