i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
