All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
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