So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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