Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
