Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Sext me about skeletons
my liver is dry heaving
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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