masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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