the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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