If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Randomize
