She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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