508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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