he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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