four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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