She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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