how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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