There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
