This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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