When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
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I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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