There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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