I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
you didnt know i had herpes?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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