Your favorite bartender is back from prision
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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