Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
