did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
