You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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