He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Randomize
