But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
