Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
