I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
