do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
