she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
