when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
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Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
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Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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