looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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