i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize