i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize